So I see here in the news Anthony Weiner is to plead guilty in Federal Court today. He’s got a plea agreement; one count, and the judge decides the sentence. He was sexting a 15 year old girl, a high school sophomore. There’s a potential ten year stretch, but that ain’t going to happen. Prosecutors are asking for two years, the defense is expected to ask for probation.

weiner-166x300 Anthony Weiner Has Some "Splainin" To Do
The Many Faces of Disgraced Politician Anthony Weiner.

Meanwhile, a uniformed White House Secret Service officer got twenty years for essentially the same behavior. He was sending photos of his nether parts to someone he thought was a teenage girl. In his case, however, he was sending them from the guard booth at the White House. His actual charges were: “enticement of a minor to engage in sexual activity and attempting to transfer obscene materials to a minor.” The latter is what they got Weiner on. No charge was brought for the officer not paying attention while guarding the leader of the free world.

The secret service guy has a wife and two children. The wife begged the judge to give him the minimum 10 year sentence. “I ask that you consider the lowest possible sentence as it would greatly benefit our children, as well as myself.” The judge reportedly muttered “Well too fucking bad, lady,” and threw the book at him.

On the other hand, Weiner, one of the articles said, would likely end up having to register as a sex offender. Or not. It’s up to the judge. But really, what’s the point? It’s Weiner, everybody! If you know who he is, you know he’s a sex offender for fuck’s sake. The fact that it’s Weiner is its own version of sex offender registration. Everybody knows not to leave him unsupervised around teenage girls.

But for the sake of argument, let’s say Weiner decides to go incognito, get away from the media, live a quiet and simple life. Let’s say he moves to a small town in a “flyover” state and assumes a different name. You think people aren’t going to think something hinky is going on? Yeah they are. You’re in a small farming town in Kansas and you suddenly have a sweaty 50 year old New York Jew working the counter at Wendy’s? A guy with a nasty attitude getting into shouting matches with the customers? You think people aren’t going to look into that? Find out who he is? “We got the internet out here in the sticks too, Brah.”

I’d love to see that. Just as Weiner’s finishing his shift, the evening news reporter shows up at Wendy’s with a camera crew and some hard-hitting questions. Weiner’s eyes scan furtively for exits. He’s argumentative, combative, insistent his name is Hugh McBride, or some such. I can see the sheriff escorting him to the county line. And just like that Weiner, the scornful man, moves on to the next little town.

weiner-166x300 Anthony Weiner Has Some "Splainin" To Do
Anthony Weiner Seems Pensive

Whoops! This just in: Weiner left court after pleading guilty to the one charge. It’s reported he was crying in court as he apologized for his behavior and bemoaned the fact he’d destroyed his “life’s dream in public service.” You know what I say to that, don’t you? I say FUCK his “life’s dream,’ whether it’s “public service” or whatever other slimebag racket the guy ultimately decided to choose. Because make no mistake, folks, politics is just as sleazy a racket as dealing drugs, prostitution, or murder for hire.

And here’s the poetic justice: “The judge told him he would have to register as a sex offender.”

You just can’t make this stuff up, folks…

M. Nick